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Hey - it's Sunday.

Let's talk about the dumbest brand extension in history. And in my research, one of my new favourite stories of marketing failure.

Colgate's Frozen Food Disaster

In the early 1980s, Colgate decided to solve a problem nobody had:

"What if the company that makes your toothpaste... also made your dinner?"

When Your Dinner Tastes Like Your Toothpaste

The logic went something like this:

1. People eat food

2. People brush their teeth after eating food

3. ???

4. Profit!

Colgate Kitchen Entrees: The meal that makes you want to brush your teeth

Colgate launched a line of frozen TV dinners called "Colgate Kitchen Entrees."

Think about that for a second.

The same brand that sells you minty fresh toothpaste wanted you to buy their beef stroganoff.

The same logo on your chicken casserole as on the tube you squeeze into your mouth.

What could possibly go wrong? Maybe everything.

Your Brain: "Does This Lasagna Taste Minty Fresh?"

It bombed.

Like, spectacularly bombed.

Turns out, people don't want to associate their food with the taste of toothpaste.

One of the fastest product failures in consumer history, it was pulled from shelves almost immediately.

Not the Food's Fault (It Died for Your Marketing Sins)

Here's the thing: by all accounts, the food itself was fine.

The problem was purely psychological.

Every time someone looked at the Colgate logo on the box, they thought about brushing their teeth. About mint. About that weird orange juice taste after you brush.

Your brain can't separate the associations.

The "Just Because You Can Doesn't Mean You Should" Principle

Just because you can slap your logo on something doesn't mean you should.

Brand extensions need to make sense to your customers. They need to feel natural.

A simple test: If you told a customer about your new product category and their immediate reaction is "huh?", maybe reconsider.

Colgate thought they were leveraging brand recognition.

Instead, they created brand confusion.

"AI-Powered" = Today's Marketing Toothpaste Dinner

This isn't just a funny story from the 80s.

It's happening right now with AI.

Companies are slapping "AI-powered" onto everything because it's the new hotness.

AI toothbrushes. AI yoga mats. AI water bottles.

Just yesterday, I walked through Best Buy and saw an "AI-connected washing machine."

Like... I really don't want ChatGPT knowing whether or not I'm washing my underwear. That's weird.

Most of these products don't actually do anything different. They just have "AI" in the name.

And guess what? People are already rebelling against it.

Because when your product says "AI" but doesn't actually solve a real problem better, you're just creating the 2025 version of Colgate TV dinners.

The psychological reaction is the same:

"This doesn't make sense. Something feels off here."

Your One-Question Brand Extension BS Detector

Your brand isn't just a logo. It's a set of associations in people's minds.

When Colgate = "clean mouth" in everyone's brain, you can't suddenly make it mean "delicious dinner" too.

Could they have succeeded with a different brand name? Probably.

But "Colgate Kitchen Entrees" belongs in the brand extension hall of shame, right next to Harley-Davidson cake decorating kits and Cheetos-flavored lip balm.

Next time you're brainstorming brand extensions, remember: just because you're successful in one category doesn't mean your brand can go anywhere.

And before you slap "AI-powered" on your next product, ask yourself: "Am I creating the next Colgate TV dinner?"

Some lines aren't meant to be crossed.

Like toothpaste and TV dinners. Or AI and... well, almost everything it's currently being added to.

✌️ Tim "Brushes After Every Brand Extension" Hanson
CMO @Penfriend.ai

P.S. If anyone from Oral-B is reading this, please don't get any ideas about launching a line of breakfast cereals. We've been through enough.

P.P.S. The typing challenge from Wednesday’s newsletter is still open btw. Check the P.S. There are Penfriend credits on the line.